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The Argument Continues

Recently i was fwded this post of one of my friends Poovithal (beautiful tamil name isnt it ? :-) and was asked my views on it , and after i commented i realized that the comment itself was long enough of a seperate post

I thought, i can share my views with my blogmates. Its one of the most discussed topics in and out of the blogshpere, but still then why the heck i should have my blog :-)

now here it goes...

The word Love in English is used in many terms unlike Tamil. The affection between a Father and her daughter is also love, at same time the kind of feeling between two youngsters is also called love, but now, atleast in our country , this word is being misused or misunderstood a lot (may be because of tamil cinemas :-)

>>> Since myself and my friends had lot of other things to discuss

:-)

During my school days, I had couple friends who wrote letters with blood, thank god!
Even though we used to site girls, at least I had the basic commonsense :-)

>>> will just talk such that no can hear

Yeah, I too wondered a lot how they are able to do this and what the heck do they talk daily so long :-)))

>>> They are not thinking about this thing before falling into love

Hmmm.... rite point... but if you ask them, they would say a poetic explanation "Love is blind"

Whenever I think of love, the very next thing that comes to my mind is Parents..., once
There was an argument with my roomies, when I was at onsite. It was about whether love
marriage is good or not, you’ll not believe we 3 ppl argued/fighted almost 5 continuous hours in a Sunday evening.... during the start me and other guy were against love but towards the end, only me was left against the love..

My argument was like...., "I don’t blindly hate love or blindly be against love. I am against only people who hurt their parents by falling in love"...

say, if there is a set of parents little bit open minded (no parents would 100% accept love, not just because they hate love, but just an over care they have on their children) surely they never be hurted by their children loving, surely they will talk to their child and their chosen partner, try to understand whether they both are in infatuation or real love.. Etc... And proceed...

there are these other set of parents, so innocent, they believe so much in us, they allow us to take our decisions during studies, or going to work or going abroad, or making other career plans, but when children of these parents go and stand before them with love, is this what they expected from them ? Is this the best result that a child could give in returns of TRUST what the parents had kept on them?

Parents-kunu evlo kanavugal irukum, sure, namakum namma life pathi kanavugal irukum, athu nama life, not our parents life...ellam true, BUT WHAT IS WORTH OF PROCEEDING TO MAKING OUR DREAMS COME TRUE BY CRUSHING YOUR PARENTS TRUST AND DREAM WITH
YOUR FEAT...

Arranged marriage-naley, munna pina theriyaatha aal, but love marriage-na nalla palagunom-nu oru reason solraanga... but its realy idiotic reason...

When ppl love, they don’t see the negatives, they grow more expectations... so when they see even a small -ve after marriage, it bursts like anything...

But when arranged... you tend to adjust yourself or make the other adjust to yourself that is called love...

rendu likely thinking ulavunga seratha vida, konjam differences thaan makes life interesting... surely making it a problem or making it interesting is in your hands... whether its love or arranged marriage.. So don’t blame arranged marriage...

Then, they say... jaadhi and other social differences will go off...cmon... its another bull shit reason... , show me a intercast love marriage, after which the girl hasnt turned into the guys cast or the kid hasnt choosen any cast... it will never happen..

For that to change... every individual has to do thier role in the society, so athukum the type of marraige-kum avlo neraya influence kedayathu...

Sometimes, ppl even say that oru kolandhaiyoda vantha parents manasu maariruvaanga, c’mon... they dont change minds but they just have to accept you, no other go... but whatever they accept, Avunga manasula naama erpaduthuna Kaayam, Kaayam thaaney... athu ennaikumey aaraathu... athu manasula uruthikitey irukum... is that what we should gift our parents...?

Life-ndrathu enathu, orutharuku oruthar vitukudutho porathu, orutharoda enangala aduthavunga mathichu nadakurathu.... so why don’t we apply that to our parents... you can even say, why cant we expect that from our parrents to do it for us, cmon... your parrents have already sacrificed thier entire life for you..., if at this point you say that, who asked them to sacrifice, its foolish decision by them, did i ask them to do so, or say its thier duty.. Then you are sick!! I know a person from a very remote village but given abundance freedom to go out of village and study (there weren’t much girls studying so high in their community)..., then that friend was sent out to long distance to work in a very remote place... that too when the friends close relatives pressed so much not to send that far, the parents had so much confidence,trust and love to make the friends wishes to come true... then the friend even went to a different country when the entire set of relatives were against this decision.. Still the parents had the same trust and love to make her wishes true...

At the end do you know what happened, the friend didn’t care of the parents trust or the other children’s future, the friend came with a love to the parents... and the love was like proposed in a telephonic conversation, from whom the friend used to chat for 1 hour daily and that too, the way it was proposed was like, "lets start moving close to eachother, if you wish lets continue, else we can depart"...., i really dunno how genuine this is, on outer it may look a very gentle approach, but i personally feel its such a mean approach..

I would again say...
Parents-kunu evlo kanavugal irukum, sure, namakum namma life pathi kanavugal irukum, athu nama life, not our parents life...ellam true, BUT WHAT IS WORTH OF PROCEEDING TO MAKING OUR DREAMS COME TRUE BY CRUSHING YOUR PARENTS TRUST AND DREAM WITH YOUR FEAT...

If really the parents are ready for any of your decisions, then you choosing your own partner is always better (but it needs to be the right age and right way)...

LET US NOT SPOIL THE TRUST AND DREAMS OF OUR PARENTS.... cauz... Once it’s destroyed... It hurts a LOT...

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  • Blogger Sugee says so:
    Sunday, March 19, 2006 3:12:00 PM  

    Why should our parents hurt us by saying no to a love marriage, is that also breaking of trust.
    Why cant we choose a partner 4 ourselves when we r going to live with that person 4 life.
    This argument will go on for ever
    but i would like to argue with u in person
    not from this comment section top

  • Blogger யாத்திரீகன் says so:
    Monday, April 10, 2006 6:28:00 PM  

    @sugee:
    >>> parents hurt us

    when the mother thinks twice or rejects before buying a sweet from a new buyer at roadside, does it means shes hurting or doesnt understands the kids thoughts...

    one may debate that, a kids wish and a youngsters choice cannot be compared... but we are always kids to our parents..

    Its the over caution & love they have over us, makes them take such decisions, we need to understand this...

    i'm not against of ourselves choosing a partner, i'm just against the fact of hurting the parents..

    and as you said, the argument continues... :-) top

  • Blogger Deekshanya says so:
    Wednesday, October 11, 2006 4:52:00 PM  

    Awesome thoughts.. But then I can't say if I totally agree with you nor disagree with you! But gud post!
    -Deeksh top